You are invited to play Assassin:

Players try to eliminate each other from the game using mock weapons (in the form of a "Nerf" gun) in an effort to become the last surviving player. Assassin is a lifestyle-invading game. Game play occurs at all hours and in all places. Since an elimination attempt could occur at any given time, successful players are obligated to develop a healthy degree of watchful paranoia.

Kills: The aim of the game is for players to track down and eliminate their targets until only one player remains. When a player eliminates his target, he gets his victim's target. When only one player remains the game is over. Once you have made a kill please contact the referee to confirm your kill. Any disputes will be decided by the referee. A clean kill must be a head or body shot. Shots to arms and legs do not count as kills.

If someone is trying to kill you, defending yourself is legal. If you kill someone in defense email the referee to change the order of victims.

Safe Zones: Designated safe Zones for privacy and safety are in play. No Kills can be made in the privacy of one's home. For job security reasons no kills can be made at any player's place of work. This includes the surrounding parking lots. In route between the two are open season. For safety reasons please use your best judgment in making kills as to not cause outside interference/trouble with certain government agencies or put anyone in potentially harmful situations. Remember, this is a game. Please note that the referee, "Ref Irie" (i.e. Toby Sharp) assumes no liability for anything and is merely setting up the game (and he's not playing so don't shoot him).

Please email ref.irie@gmail.com to either "Accept" or "Deny" taking place is Assassin: The Game. Once word has been received from all participants, targets will be chosen and assignments sent.

If we hear from all potential participants, we will contact you via email and gameplay will commence at 12:01 a.m., Monday, October 13, 2014. Assassins are encouraged to collect "trophies" (i.e. cell phone pictures) of the victim so the ref can post them on the official site, refirie.com-- when reporting kills via email, please send trophies if possible.

Dead Pool!

Rumored to be coming soon...

Double Nerficide!

Seems someone was busy the other night while the Ref was preparing for a brief trip to the desert... first was Todd "The Riddler" Johnston:

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...then Mike Brady...

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Rumor has it that Todd managed to write one more riddle before the sponginess of the bullet worked its way to home... we'll see if that surfaces or not...

Who's next?

What? Billy, too?

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Poor Billy Jones. Poor, poor Billy Jones. Again, the assassin left a note that the Ref accidentally transposed with the note found at the last corpse but which now is clearly meant for this corpse:

"Of Jaguars and Fisherman"

A mysterious black cat creeps along in search of fuel.
Silent hunters troll behind finshing for a kill.
The unsuspecting victim feasts while its demise encroaches upon the oil-stained concrete.

Who is the hunter and who is the hunted?
Only the dead know these things....

And now there are seven...

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Another has joined the ranks of the Nerfed! Alas, poor Lindsey, I knew her Horatio... all that remained next to her Nerf-ridden corpse was another mysterious, perhaps even creepy note scribbled in crayon on a generic brown bag one could find almost anywhere:

"Death by Starbucks"
The sweet taste of chai on a lover's wet lips.
This very place we met in which I sip.
Milk steams as I gently pull the plastic trigger.
On the floor, my love's blood runs thicker.



Note: Be real clear when you send emails (as in, "I killed X") before going all Riddler. Ref Irie is busy this week.

Farewell, Ronnie!

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Poor Ronnie Nelson. He never saw it coming. The only evidence at the scene of the nerfing was a poem (and did we get invaded by the Batman universe or something, a la "The Riddler"?)... watch your backs! Moohahahahahaha.

Scribbled in crayon on a generic paper bag was found the following message:

"Footsteps behind, as I walk fancy free.
Who could that be so rapidly approaching me?
The sound of a click, the wiz of the nerf
Life is so short here upon the earth."

All is not well... how we like it. Best of luck.

-Ref Irie

Assignments sent... may the dice fall where they will.

You lookin' at me? Who knows whom is looking at whom. Word on the street is that the assignments have been emailed to those participating. Gameplay begins at Thursday, May 15, 2008 at 12:01 a.m. Just ask yourself one question, punk... do you feel lucky?